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I was...
The person who harmed me was a...
I identify as...
My sexual orientation is...
I identify as...
I was...
When this occurred I also experienced...
This is a space where survivors of trauma and abuse share their stories alongside supportive allies. These stories remind us that hope exists even in dark times. You are never alone in your experience. Healing is possible for everyone.
It does get better as the years go by, I barely think about it 10 years down the line. It's hard especially without justice, but it's important to try to remove the power the attacker has over your life.
Report
I’m not going to promise you it gets better because I don’t know if it does. You can get better at dealing with trauma however it may never go away and that is something that is difficult coming to terms with. All I can advise is do not let what happened to you define you. You are how you deal with life not how life deals with you.
Report
I am still working to be healed. I'm want to be listened to, I want to be believed, I want to be free from abuse and I want my child to be safe and free from abuse.
Report
Healing is something I once assumed was a quick fix. Nov 2022 I was assaulted and raped - I was in denial and running off a mixture of fear and adrenaline until Nov 2024; where my body literally shut down for 2 weeks. I've over eaten. I've over drank. I neglected myself. I self-harmed. I attempted to take my life multiple times. All of which most would disapprove of especially as i often continue with no.3&4 to this day. Yet, it kept me alive. What I'm trying to say is recovery and healing is not linear. My coping methods worked for me but they might not work for you. I don't even think I would recommend mine. However, once I learned to accept everything I believe that's when I truly started to heal. The night he raped me, I died inside. Who I once was; destroyed. So I have been trying to rebuild ever since...progress is slow and small; especially living with ptsd but; progress is progress.
Dear reader, this message contains language of self-harm that some may find triggering or discomforting.
Report
Healing to me is forgiving yourself for what happened. Knowing it’s ok to distance yourself from family if they aren’t supporting you. Only sharing your story with people you’ve built trust with, cause you no longer feel vulnerable. Being able to accept what happened without knowing why it happened to you.
Report
healing to me is not having these issues constantly interfering with my life. after doing so much research on cocsa I have realised that this trauma may have made me hyper sexualised, and that is something I struggle with often. healing is to feel like I am enough.
Report
I think anyone who can overcome this kind of trauma is amazing.
Report
Your going to heal, time heals you. Tell your family, it took me two years to tell mine and yes it hurt me and then but he was in the wrong. It’s not your fault, use it as a strength in your life, it gets better I promise dont give up x
Report
What healing means for me is that I’m slowly accepting that this wasn’t my fault that nothing could’ve prevented this it’s never a survivors fault that’s right I’m a survivor never give up for years I’ve suffered but I’m healing the wounds he created with support around me
Report
What’s the next thing you’re looking forward to? It could be as simple at a sunrise.
Report
It's not your shame to carry Speak your story, it's your to tell Don't let anyone else's discomfort make you feel uncomfortable.
Report
This is a hard but honest one... I thought I would never enjoy sex again. But I have met a man that has shown me with trust this is no longer the case.
Report
I’m in a loving Marraige, three amazing kids, good job, great friends - it took a tough road to get here but it was worth it xxx
Report
If you feel trapped in a relationship like this and you do not feel safe, go to someone for help. You might not be strong enough alone.
Report
This is a space where survivors of trauma and abuse share their stories alongside supportive allies. These stories remind us that hope exists even in dark times. You are never alone in your experience. Healing is possible for everyone.
I am still working to be healed. I'm want to be listened to, I want to be believed, I want to be free from abuse and I want my child to be safe and free from abuse.
Report
Healing is something I once assumed was a quick fix. Nov 2022 I was assaulted and raped - I was in denial and running off a mixture of fear and adrenaline until Nov 2024; where my body literally shut down for 2 weeks. I've over eaten. I've over drank. I neglected myself. I self-harmed. I attempted to take my life multiple times. All of which most would disapprove of especially as i often continue with no.3&4 to this day. Yet, it kept me alive. What I'm trying to say is recovery and healing is not linear. My coping methods worked for me but they might not work for you. I don't even think I would recommend mine. However, once I learned to accept everything I believe that's when I truly started to heal. The night he raped me, I died inside. Who I once was; destroyed. So I have been trying to rebuild ever since...progress is slow and small; especially living with ptsd but; progress is progress.
Dear reader, this message contains language of self-harm that some may find triggering or discomforting.
Report
healing to me is not having these issues constantly interfering with my life. after doing so much research on cocsa I have realised that this trauma may have made me hyper sexualised, and that is something I struggle with often. healing is to feel like I am enough.
Report
I think anyone who can overcome this kind of trauma is amazing.
Report
What’s the next thing you’re looking forward to? It could be as simple at a sunrise.
Report
It's not your shame to carry Speak your story, it's your to tell Don't let anyone else's discomfort make you feel uncomfortable.
Report
I’m in a loving Marraige, three amazing kids, good job, great friends - it took a tough road to get here but it was worth it xxx
Report
If you feel trapped in a relationship like this and you do not feel safe, go to someone for help. You might not be strong enough alone.
Report
I’m not going to promise you it gets better because I don’t know if it does. You can get better at dealing with trauma however it may never go away and that is something that is difficult coming to terms with. All I can advise is do not let what happened to you define you. You are how you deal with life not how life deals with you.
Report
What healing means for me is that I’m slowly accepting that this wasn’t my fault that nothing could’ve prevented this it’s never a survivors fault that’s right I’m a survivor never give up for years I’ve suffered but I’m healing the wounds he created with support around me
Report
It does get better as the years go by, I barely think about it 10 years down the line. It's hard especially without justice, but it's important to try to remove the power the attacker has over your life.
Report
Healing to me is forgiving yourself for what happened. Knowing it’s ok to distance yourself from family if they aren’t supporting you. Only sharing your story with people you’ve built trust with, cause you no longer feel vulnerable. Being able to accept what happened without knowing why it happened to you.
Report
Your going to heal, time heals you. Tell your family, it took me two years to tell mine and yes it hurt me and then but he was in the wrong. It’s not your fault, use it as a strength in your life, it gets better I promise dont give up x
Report
This is a hard but honest one... I thought I would never enjoy sex again. But I have met a man that has shown me with trust this is no longer the case.
Report
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Please adhere to our Community Guidelines to help us keep Our Wave a safe space. All messages will be reviewed and identifying information removed before they are posted.
Grounding activity
Find a comfortable place to sit. Gently close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths - in through your nose (count to 3), out through your mouth (count of 3). Now open your eyes and look around you. Name the following out loud:
5 – things you can see (you can look within the room and out of the window)
4 – things you can feel (what is in front of you that you can touch?)
3 – things you can hear
2 – things you can smell
1 – thing you like about yourself.
Take a deep breath to end.
From where you are sitting, look around for things that have a texture or are nice or interesting to look at.
Hold an object in your hand and bring your full focus to it. Look at where shadows fall on parts of it or maybe where there are shapes that form within the object. Feel how heavy or light it is in your hand and what the surface texture feels like under your fingers (This can also be done with a pet if you have one).
Take a deep breath to end.
Ask yourself the following questions and answer them out loud:
1. Where am I?
2. What day of the week is today?
3. What is today’s date?
4. What is the current month?
5. What is the current year?
6. How old am I?
7. What season is it?
Take a deep breath to end.
Put your right hand palm down on your left shoulder. Put your left hand palm down on your right shoulder. Choose a sentence that will strengthen you. For example: “I am powerful.” Say the sentence out loud first and pat your right hand on your left shoulder, then your left hand on your right shoulder.
Alternate the patting. Do ten pats altogether, five on each side, each time repeating your sentences aloud.
Take a deep breath to end.
Cross your arms in front of you and draw them towards your chest. With your right hand, hold your left upper arm. With your left hand, hold your right upper arm. Squeeze gently, and pull your arms inwards. Hold the squeeze for a little while, finding the right amount of squeeze for you in this moment. Hold the tension and release. Then squeeze for a little while again and release. Stay like that for a moment.
Take a deep breath to end.