0
Members
0
Views
0
Reactions
0
Stories read
Need to take a break?
For immediate help, visit {{resource}}
Survivor story
#52
Original story
Message of Healing
I think I'm still trying to figure out how to accept what happened to me and that's okay. Healing isn't linear. Don't be too hard on yourself and surround yourself with people who truly, unconditionally love you.
At this point in my life I was 14 years old and the boy that I was dating was 16. I was a virgin. The guy that I was dating constantly asked me to send him dirty texts and nudes. He frequently expressed that he wanted to have sex with me fairly often. After a while i finally agreed to it. Both of my parents were at work and he came over to my house. We went upstairs and he started taking my clothes off. I was very very uncomfortable at this point. i didnt feel ready for anyone to see my body and I felt frozen. We were both on my bed and he was leaning over me. He started moving his head downward towards my vulva and i squirmed my legs around. Everything is pretty blurry but I'm pretty sure I tried to flip over to get away from him and he just grabbed my legs really hard and continued anyway. I remember giving up because he was already doing it and I felt like I had no control in the situation. After that I was silent and he eventually penetrated me. That is how i lost my virginity and for a long time i couldn't let anyone give me oral because it made me really uncomfortable. I found out that this person is now engaged and it really upset me. I think the thing that bothers me the most about the sexual trauma I have endured in my life is that these men have taken pieces of me away, pieces that i will NEVER get back, and they just get to go on and continue living their lives like nothing even happened to me. My life got destroyed and he just got to go do whatever he wanted to...
Just Checking...
Discard Message?
You have a comment in progress, are you sure you want to discard it?
0
Members
0
Views
0
Reactions
0
Stories read
Need to take a break?
For immediate help, visit {{resource}}
Please adhere to our Community Guidelines to help us keep Our Wave a safe space. All messages will be reviewed and identifying information removed before they are posted.
Grounding activity
Find a comfortable place to sit. Gently close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths - in through your nose (count to 3), out through your mouth (count of 3). Now open your eyes and look around you. Name the following out loud:
5 – things you can see (you can look within the room and out of the window)
4 – things you can feel (what is in front of you that you can touch?)
3 – things you can hear
2 – things you can smell
1 – thing you like about yourself.
Take a deep breath to end.
From where you are sitting, look around for things that have a texture or are nice or interesting to look at.
Hold an object in your hand and bring your full focus to it. Look at where shadows fall on parts of it or maybe where there are shapes that form within the object. Feel how heavy or light it is in your hand and what the surface texture feels like under your fingers (This can also be done with a pet if you have one).
Take a deep breath to end.
Ask yourself the following questions and answer them out loud:
1. Where am I?
2. What day of the week is today?
3. What is today’s date?
4. What is the current month?
5. What is the current year?
6. How old am I?
7. What season is it?
Take a deep breath to end.
Put your right hand palm down on your left shoulder. Put your left hand palm down on your right shoulder. Choose a sentence that will strengthen you. For example: “I am powerful.” Say the sentence out loud first and pat your right hand on your left shoulder, then your left hand on your right shoulder.
Alternate the patting. Do ten pats altogether, five on each side, each time repeating your sentences aloud.
Take a deep breath to end.
Cross your arms in front of you and draw them towards your chest. With your right hand, hold your left upper arm. With your left hand, hold your right upper arm. Squeeze gently, and pull your arms inwards. Hold the squeeze for a little while, finding the right amount of squeeze for you in this moment. Hold the tension and release. Then squeeze for a little while again and release. Stay like that for a moment.
Take a deep breath to end.