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Original story
no matter how mundane it seemed at the moment, or how your friends or family made you feel, you are so valid.
healing is being able to acknowledge that something traumatic happened while teaching yourself to move past it
i dont even know how to start this. when i was in 9th grade, a boy joined my friend group. i thought he was okay at first, but then he revealed his true colors. i witnessed him put his hands down other boys pants in front of multiple other students and teachers. people treated it as a joke. he began asking me and my other friend, name (we're both girls) to film porn so he could jerk off to it "as a joke." i was always uncomfortable with this, but when i protested everyone treated me like i was overreacting. couple weeks later i was laying on a giant table in our woodworking room because it was the end of class, when i noticed a shadow over me. it was him. he leaned down over me and placed his hands next to my head and said, and i quote, "they don't call me [name] the rapist for nothing." after this, i messaged my friend i mentioned earlier. i thought she would be disgusted and come to my defense. but all she said was he probably meant it as a joke. i wanted to desperately get away from him, but every single one of my friends associated with him. so i shut up. but i distanced myself as much as possible. couple days later another friend of mine brought him to my house without asking. i felt bad so i didnt protest. while we were in my room, he crawled under my bed and grabbed my legs to make me trip. then he dragged me under with him. i was wearing a skirt and he started to claw and bite at my exposed legs and thighs. i screamed and my other friend yanked me free. he didnt say a word to the perpetrator. he never asked if i was okay. a week later name started dating him, and almost all of my friends ghosted me. now they hang out with him, knowing what a fucking freak he is. i witnessed him walk around a thrift store and call baby clothes sexy LAST MONTH. nothing like everyone abandoning you to stand with someone they know assaults people!
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Grounding activity
Find a comfortable place to sit. Gently close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths - in through your nose (count to 3), out through your mouth (count of 3). Now open your eyes and look around you. Name the following out loud:
5 – things you can see (you can look within the room and out of the window)
4 – things you can feel (what is in front of you that you can touch?)
3 – things you can hear
2 – things you can smell
1 – thing you like about yourself.
Take a deep breath to end.
From where you are sitting, look around for things that have a texture or are nice or interesting to look at.
Hold an object in your hand and bring your full focus to it. Look at where shadows fall on parts of it or maybe where there are shapes that form within the object. Feel how heavy or light it is in your hand and what the surface texture feels like under your fingers (This can also be done with a pet if you have one).
Take a deep breath to end.
Ask yourself the following questions and answer them out loud:
1. Where am I?
2. What day of the week is today?
3. What is today’s date?
4. What is the current month?
5. What is the current year?
6. How old am I?
7. What season is it?
Take a deep breath to end.
Put your right hand palm down on your left shoulder. Put your left hand palm down on your right shoulder. Choose a sentence that will strengthen you. For example: “I am powerful.” Say the sentence out loud first and pat your right hand on your left shoulder, then your left hand on your right shoulder.
Alternate the patting. Do ten pats altogether, five on each side, each time repeating your sentences aloud.
Take a deep breath to end.
Cross your arms in front of you and draw them towards your chest. With your right hand, hold your left upper arm. With your left hand, hold your right upper arm. Squeeze gently, and pull your arms inwards. Hold the squeeze for a little while, finding the right amount of squeeze for you in this moment. Hold the tension and release. Then squeeze for a little while again and release. Stay like that for a moment.
Take a deep breath to end.