This is a space where survivors of trauma and abuse share their stories alongside supportive allies. These stories remind us that hope exists even in dark times. You are never alone in your experience. Healing is possible for everyone.
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Dear reader, this story contains language of self-harm that some may find triggering or discomforting.
When I was 3-8 years old I was molested by different people. One of the perpetrators was my older brother, bullies/friends from school, and I was hurt online by men. I don’t like myself. I sexually assaulted kids when I was younger. I thought it was normal. My cousin and 2 other boys dry humped me when I was 10. 2 of the boys were 6 and the other one was ten like me. I feel so much guilt everytime I think about it. I have an addiction to masterbating and I hate looking at myself. I committed COCSA and it kills me everytime I think about it. I wish that I was dead. I hate the fact that I got hurt because I started to hurt others the same way. I wonder if my cousin hates me. Because I hate me. My heart is in shambles and I wanna cry and just fall apart on the floor until I can’t breathe. I’m so overwhelmed with guilt and shame I don’t know what to do…someone please tell me what to do…
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