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Is it still sexual assault if it's the same gender? I'm female, and another female always says sexual things to me and about my body. Worse, she's been touching and gripping my thighs very high up while we're in class. Recently she threw her hand back and touched my private area. I just found out this is called sexual assault, as I thought only rape was sexual assault. I need answers please.

Answer written by a PhD Prepared Mental Health Nurse

I'm so sorry to hear that you're experiencing this situation. Yes, what you're describing could be considered sexual assault, regardless of the genders involved. Sexual assault can absolutely happen between people of the same gender. It doesn't matter if the person touching you is a girl or a boy—everyone has the right to feel safe and respected.

When someone makes sexual comments about your body, touches you in ways that make you uncomfortable, or invades your personal space without your consent, it's not okay. The behavior you're experiencing—like gripping your thighs high up and touching your private areas—is inappropriate and unacceptable, especially in a school setting. Sexual assault refers to any unwanted sexual contact or behavior that occurs without consent, and this includes what you've described.

It's important to remember that you have the right to set boundaries about who can touch you and how. Setting boundaries might feel difficult, but you can try saying things like "Please don't touch me like that," "I don't like those comments about my body," or "Stop, that makes me uncomfortable." You can also try to move away from this person when possible or ask to change seats in class. Your body belongs to you, and you get to decide who touches it and how.

I encourage you to talk to a trusted adult about what's happening. This could be a parent, guardian, teacher, school counselor, or another adult you feel comfortable with. You might start the conversation by saying, "Something is happening at school that makes me uncomfortable, and I need help." They can support you and take steps to ensure that this behavior stops.

You're brave for reaching out and seeking answers. This kind of situation can be confusing and difficult to navigate, but please know that what's happening isn't your fault, and you deserve to feel safe and respected at all times. Remember that you're not alone, and there are people who want to help you. Thank you for reaching out to us. 

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