What is the difference between sexual abuse and sexual assault? Is sexual abuse a broader term that encompasses sexual assault? If someone said what happened wasn't sexual abuse, does that mean it also wasn't sexual assault?

I'm so sorry you've been grappling with these definitions and how they might apply to your own experience. These terms can feel confusing because they're often used in different ways depending on the context—legal definitions, clinical settings, and everyday conversation don't always align.

In many discussions, sexual abuse is used as a broader term that captures a wide range of unwanted or harmful sexual behaviors, including sexual violence, exploitation, and sometimes other forms of violation like showing explicit materials to a child. Sexual assault often refers to the part of that spectrum involving direct physical acts like forced touching, penetration, or any sexual contact that occurs without someone's consent or when consent cannot be given. Both terms point to a violation of trust and bodily autonomy, and legal definitions can differ across jurisdictions.

If someone told you that what happened wasn't sexual abuse, that doesn't automatically mean it wasn't sexual assault, or vice versa. Often, the confusion comes from how people label or interpret different behaviors. People use these terms differently based on their own understanding, comfort level, or even their own denial or minimization of what happened. Someone might reject one label while the experience could still fit under another term. The language someone else uses to describe your experience doesn't change what actually happened or how it affected you.

What truly matters is whether there was unwanted sexual contact, exploitation, or a power imbalance that made free, informed consent impossible. If any of those elements were present, then it can be described as a form of sexual violence, even if certain people or institutions refer to it by one term rather than the other. What matters most isn't getting the terminology perfect—it's recognizing that you experienced something that wasn't okay and that impacted you.

You get to choose the words that feel right to you when describing your own experience. Some people prefer one term over another because it resonates more with their understanding of what happened. Others don't use any specific label at all. All of those choices are valid. If you're questioning the words that were used, remember that your feelings and the impact of what happened are what truly count.

Whether someone calls it sexual assault, sexual abuse, or both, any violation of your boundaries and bodily safety is valid and significant. It may help to speak with a professional who understands these nuances—they can explain how definitions are used where you live so you can get clarity about your situation. The most important thing is recognizing that you deserve respect, safety, and support, no matter how others label the experience. You're not alone, and there are people who believe you and want to help. Thank you for trusting us with this question.