🇺🇸
Survivor story

Processing everything all at once

Original story

Message to a Survivor

What happened to you is valid. Trauma is trauma, and don’t let anybody make you believe you’re being dramatic because you’re not. Your hurt is valid and I believe you. And I support you.

Message of Healing

I’m finding healing through speaking about my abuse and turning to God. My heart hurts every time I remember the abuse, but my hope is that healing will take all that hurt and shame away.

I’ve been violated my entire life. Sexual assault and sexual harassment. By a man that I can’t even remember the face of when I was 3. By my own brother for many years. By random strangers. Usually I don’t let it get to me, but it has been lately and I realized it’s because I never acknowledge it and I’ve never spoken about to anyone in person. The main one that bothers me is the sexual abuse I endured by the hands of my brother. He would touch me, expose himself, grope me, peep at me…it was terrible. My hearts breaks every time I think of it. A part of me feels like it’s dying and I hate that. I’m so young still, but my soul feels so aged. However, there’s a part of me that invalidates my own experiences. A part that keeps saying “well, at least it wasn’t rape”. I have to keep reminding myself that even if it wasn’t rape, my trauma is still valid. But it’s getting harder to do everyday. I know I’m not the only one, but it certainly feels like I am.

Just Checking...

Discard Message?

You have a comment in progress, are you sure you want to discard it?

Similar community content

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat massa quis enim. Donec pede justo, fringilla vel, aliquet nec, vulputate

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat massa quis enim. Donec pede justo, fringilla vel, aliquet nec, vulputate

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat massa quis enim. Donec pede justo, fringilla vel, aliquet nec, vulputate

0

Members

0

Views

0

Reactions

0

Stories read

Need to take a break?

For immediate help, visit {{resource}}

Made with in Raleigh, NC

|

Read our Community Guidelines, Privacy Policy, and Terms

|

Post a Message

Share a message of support with the community.

We will send you an email as soon as your message is posted, as well as send helpful resources and support.

Please adhere to our Community Guidelines to help us keep Our Wave a safe space. All messages will be reviewed and identifying information removed before they are posted.

Ask a Question

Ask a question about survivorship or supporting survivors.

We will send you an email as soon as your question is answered, as well as send helpful resources and support.

How can we help?

Tell us why you are reporting this content. Our moderation team will review your report shortly.

Violence, hate, or exploitation

Threats, hateful language, or sexual coercion

Bullying or unwanted contact

Harassment, intimidation, or persistent unwanted messages

Scam, fraud, or impersonation

Deceptive requests or claiming to be someone else

False information

Misleading claims or deliberate disinformation

Share Feedback

Tell us what’s working (and what isn't) so we can keep improving.

Log in

Enter the email you used to submit to Our Wave and we'll send you a magic link to access your profile.

Grounding activity

Find a comfortable place to sit. Gently close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths - in through your nose (count to 3), out through your mouth (count of 3). Now open your eyes and look around you. Name the following out loud:

5 – things you can see (you can look within the room and out of the window)

4 – things you can feel (what is in front of you that you can touch?)

3 – things you can hear

2 – things you can smell

1 – thing you like about yourself.

Take a deep breath to end.

From where you are sitting, look around for things that have a texture or are nice or interesting to look at.

Hold an object in your hand and bring your full focus to it. Look at where shadows fall on parts of it or maybe where there are shapes that form within the object. Feel how heavy or light it is in your hand and what the surface texture feels like under your fingers (This can also be done with a pet if you have one).

Take a deep breath to end.

Ask yourself the following questions and answer them out loud:

1. Where am I?

2. What day of the week is today?

3. What is today’s date?

4. What is the current month?

5. What is the current year?

6. How old am I?

7. What season is it?

Take a deep breath to end.

Put your right hand palm down on your left shoulder. Put your left hand palm down on your right shoulder. Choose a sentence that will strengthen you. For example: “I am powerful.” Say the sentence out loud first and pat your right hand on your left shoulder, then your left hand on your right shoulder.

Alternate the patting. Do ten pats altogether, five on each side, each time repeating your sentences aloud.

Take a deep breath to end.

Cross your arms in front of you and draw them towards your chest. With your right hand, hold your left upper arm. With your left hand, hold your right upper arm. Squeeze gently, and pull your arms inwards. Hold the squeeze for a little while, finding the right amount of squeeze for you in this moment. Hold the tension and release. Then squeeze for a little while again and release. Stay like that for a moment.

Take a deep breath to end.