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Survivor story

#935

Original story

Message to a Survivor

I know your sense of safety and trust has been damaged or revoked from. you. You deserve to experience true lobe, safety, and trust. I believe you are very strong and capable, keep on making waves in your own joinery of life. Remember you cn choose to heal from the pain, but suffering is not required. You are valid and heard, I will pray for you to receive all the love, healing, and guidance that you deserve. Love, Initials

I met a stranger on the app Renz, an app for making friends he was around my age maybe a year younger. I didn't even like him as a person very much, likely because my intuition knew he was actually a bad person. I probably should not have gotten his number, snapchat, and instagram. However, it is not my fault I was trying to just make friends. He was really very dry of a talker, conversations were short, boring, never got to get to know each other through snapchats off him skateboarding and going to amusement parks. He mostly acted regularly, but I vaguely recall now that he made a sexual innuendo that I should have taken as a red flag and not forgiven him for. Anyways, today I opened snapchat to check my messages and was surprised and equally disturbed to see a video of him stroking his penis with flash on in the dark. I was disgusted, disturbed, felt take advantage of in a way I never thought that I would be and certainly never wanted to. In the moment I felt scarred, I thought maybe it was a porn video he found online, yet that still would not make it okay. Its was inexcusable and shameful behavior. He should be ashamed and disgusted by his display of unconsented sexual harassment. This will scar me for life to some degree, luckily I never met this horrible person, but it made me even more wary of guys. Please be careful and lets fight to minimize sexual violence, harassment and assault as much as possible! NO ONE DESERVES TO EXPERIENCE SEXUAL HARASSMENT OR ASSAULT.

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Grounding activity

Find a comfortable place to sit. Gently close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths - in through your nose (count to 3), out through your mouth (count of 3). Now open your eyes and look around you. Name the following out loud:

5 – things you can see (you can look within the room and out of the window)

4 – things you can feel (what is in front of you that you can touch?)

3 – things you can hear

2 – things you can smell

1 – thing you like about yourself.

Take a deep breath to end.

From where you are sitting, look around for things that have a texture or are nice or interesting to look at.

Hold an object in your hand and bring your full focus to it. Look at where shadows fall on parts of it or maybe where there are shapes that form within the object. Feel how heavy or light it is in your hand and what the surface texture feels like under your fingers (This can also be done with a pet if you have one).

Take a deep breath to end.

Ask yourself the following questions and answer them out loud:

1. Where am I?

2. What day of the week is today?

3. What is today’s date?

4. What is the current month?

5. What is the current year?

6. How old am I?

7. What season is it?

Take a deep breath to end.

Put your right hand palm down on your left shoulder. Put your left hand palm down on your right shoulder. Choose a sentence that will strengthen you. For example: “I am powerful.” Say the sentence out loud first and pat your right hand on your left shoulder, then your left hand on your right shoulder.

Alternate the patting. Do ten pats altogether, five on each side, each time repeating your sentences aloud.

Take a deep breath to end.

Cross your arms in front of you and draw them towards your chest. With your right hand, hold your left upper arm. With your left hand, hold your right upper arm. Squeeze gently, and pull your arms inwards. Hold the squeeze for a little while, finding the right amount of squeeze for you in this moment. Hold the tension and release. Then squeeze for a little while again and release. Stay like that for a moment.

Take a deep breath to end.