--- title: Abuse Has Many Forms ~ Our Wave Community description: Learning about the different forms and signs of abuse saved me. I never thought I would end up a victim of domestic abuse. My lack of knowledge on what abuse... url: https://community.ourwave.org/en/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491.md --- {{customAnalyticsScripts}} [\[Image: Our Wave Logo\]\[Image: Our Wave Logo\]](/en/) [ Community ](/en/)[ Questions & Answers ](/en/learn)[ Find Support ](/en/resources) Share story Post a message 0 Users 0 Views 0 Reactions 0 Stories read ##### Need to take a break? Try a grounding activity For immediate help, visit {{resource}} Show resources for \[Image: United States\]United States [\[Image: Argentina\]Argentina](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ar)[\[Image: Australia\]Australia](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=au)[\[Image: Bolivia\]Bolivia](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=bo)[\[Image: Canada\]Canada](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ca)[\[Image: Chile\]Chile](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=cl)[\[Image: Colombia\]Colombia](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=co)[\[Image: Costa Rica\]Costa Rica](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=cr)[\[Image: Cuba\]Cuba](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=cu)[\[Image: Dominican Republic\]Dominican Republic](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=do)[\[Image: Ecuador\]Ecuador](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ec)[\[Image: El Salvador\]El Salvador](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=sv)[\[Image: Equatorial Guinea\]Equatorial Guinea](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=gq)[\[Image: Guatemala\]Guatemala](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=gt)[\[Image: Honduras\]Honduras](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=hn)[\[Image: Ireland\]Ireland](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ie)[\[Image: Japan\]Japan](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=jp)[\[Image: Mexico\]Mexico](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=mx)[\[Image: Nicaragua\]Nicaragua](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ni)[\[Image: New Zealand\]New Zealand](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=nz)[\[Image: Panama\]Panama](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=pa)[\[Image: Paraguay\]Paraguay](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=py)[\[Image: Peru\]Peru](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=pe)[\[Image: Puerto Rico\]Puerto Rico](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=pr)[\[Image: Spain\]Spain](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=es)[\[Image: United Kingdom\]United Kingdom](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=gb)[\[Image: Uruguay\]Uruguay](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=uy)[\[Image: Venezuela\]Venezuela](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ve) English [English](/en/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491)[Español](/es/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491)[日本語](/ja/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491) [ About Us ](https://www.ourwave.org/en/who-we-are) Made with in Raleigh, NC Read our [Community Guidelines](https://www.ourwave.org/en/community-guidelines), [Privacy Policy](https://www.ourwave.org/en/privacy), and [Terms](https://www.ourwave.org/en/terms) Have feedback? Send it to us 🇺🇸 ##### Survivor story # Abuse Has Many Forms Original story ##### Message to a Survivor It is not your fault. You are strong and capable. Love does not hurt. Learning about the different forms and signs of abuse saved me. I never thought I would end up a victim of domestic abuse. My lack of knowledge on what abuse looks like resulted in me falling right into my abusers trap. The five year long relationship began normally, I quickly fell in love with a partner that showered me in compliments and exciting experiences. About 6 months in, the warning signs began to show, and my family expressed concern, but I brushed it off, as I was overall happy with them at the time. Things quickly got worse, and I was isolated from my friends and family. I was subject to frequent criticism and belittling, name calling and being mocked while I cried, fully believing that I was the problem. I was comforted by calm talks from my partner after explosive outbursts, agreeing that things will be better once I learn to do better. Despite my efforts, this never stopped. I was constantly walking on eggshells around them. God forbid I upset them while they were driving, or they would speed and weave through heavy traffic, screaming and slamming their fists on the steering wheel. Then they began throwing things during outbursts. Screaming at me so close to my face I could feel spit landing on it. They angrily grabbed my wrist once, and looking back I see now the progression that was being made toward more physical violence. Resources online and finally reaching out to my family opened my eyes to what was happening. I felt brainwashed, and it took time to fully accept it for what it was. When I left, at one point my abuser stood in front of the door so I couldn’t leave. They yelled and knocked things over. Another form of physical abuse. I am in therapy now, and working through PTSD. I am so grateful for my family and friends, and the support online that gave me the strength and knowledge I needed to get out. I now know that what I went through was not my fault. My abuser was a master manipulator, as most are. Everyone can benefit from being knowledgeable on the many forms of abuse that exist. Random Story [ 0 Comment(s) Comment(s) ](/en/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491#comments) - Report #### Just Checking... #### Discard Message? You have a comment in progress, are you sure you want to discard it? Cancel Discard ##### Similar community content Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat massa quis enim. Donec pede justo, fringilla vel, aliquet nec, vulputate Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat massa quis enim. Donec pede justo, fringilla vel, aliquet nec, vulputate Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat massa quis enim. Donec pede justo, fringilla vel, aliquet nec, vulputate 0 Users 0 Views 0 Reactions 0 Stories read ##### Need to take a break? Try a grounding activity For immediate help, visit {{resource}} Show resources for \[Image: United States\]United States [\[Image: Argentina\]Argentina](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ar)[\[Image: Australia\]Australia](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=au)[\[Image: Bolivia\]Bolivia](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=bo)[\[Image: Canada\]Canada](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ca)[\[Image: Chile\]Chile](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=cl)[\[Image: Colombia\]Colombia](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=co)[\[Image: Costa Rica\]Costa Rica](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=cr)[\[Image: Cuba\]Cuba](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=cu)[\[Image: Dominican Republic\]Dominican Republic](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=do)[\[Image: Ecuador\]Ecuador](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ec)[\[Image: El Salvador\]El Salvador](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=sv)[\[Image: Equatorial Guinea\]Equatorial Guinea](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=gq)[\[Image: Guatemala\]Guatemala](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=gt)[\[Image: Honduras\]Honduras](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=hn)[\[Image: Ireland\]Ireland](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ie)[\[Image: Japan\]Japan](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=jp)[\[Image: Mexico\]Mexico](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=mx)[\[Image: Nicaragua\]Nicaragua](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ni)[\[Image: New Zealand\]New Zealand](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=nz)[\[Image: Panama\]Panama](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=pa)[\[Image: Paraguay\]Paraguay](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=py)[\[Image: Peru\]Peru](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=pe)[\[Image: Puerto Rico\]Puerto Rico](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=pr)[\[Image: Spain\]Spain](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=es)[\[Image: United Kingdom\]United Kingdom](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=gb)[\[Image: Uruguay\]Uruguay](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=uy)[\[Image: Venezuela\]Venezuela](/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491?country=ve) English [English](/en/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491)[Español](/es/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491)[日本語](/ja/story/abuse-has-many-forms-1491) For immediate help, visit {{resource}} Made with in Raleigh, NC | Read our [Community Guidelines](https://www.ourwave.org/en/community-guidelines), [Privacy Policy](https://www.ourwave.org/en/privacy), and [Terms](https://www.ourwave.org/en/terms) | [ #### Resources ](/en/resources) ### Post a Message Share a message of support with the community. 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Name the following out loud: 5 – things you can see (you can look within the room and out of the window) 4 – things you can feel (what is in front of you that you can touch?) 3 – things you can hear 2 – things you can smell 1 – thing you like about yourself. Take a deep breath to end. From where you are sitting, look around for things that have a texture or are nice or interesting to look at. Hold an object in your hand and bring your full focus to it. Look at where shadows fall on parts of it or maybe where there are shapes that form within the object. Feel how heavy or light it is in your hand and what the surface texture feels like under your fingers (This can also be done with a pet if you have one). Take a deep breath to end. Ask yourself the following questions and answer them out loud: 1\. Where am I? 2\. What day of the week is today? 3\. What is today’s date? 4\. What is the current month? 5\. What is the current year? 6\. How old am I? 7\. What season is it? Take a deep breath to end. Put your right hand palm down on your left shoulder. Put your left hand palm down on your right shoulder. Choose a sentence that will strengthen you. For example: “I am powerful.” Say the sentence out loud first and pat your right hand on your left shoulder, then your left hand on your right shoulder. Alternate the patting. Do ten pats altogether, five on each side, each time repeating your sentences aloud. Take a deep breath to end. Cross your arms in front of you and draw them towards your chest. With your right hand, hold your left upper arm. With your left hand, hold your right upper arm. Squeeze gently, and pull your arms inwards. Hold the squeeze for a little while, finding the right amount of squeeze for you in this moment. Hold the tension and release. Then squeeze for a little while again and release. Stay like that for a moment. Take a deep breath to end. Try another grounding activity I feel grounded and ready