---
title: I've noticed in discussions about child-on-child sexual abuse (COCSA) that most cases seem to involve victims who are young children or early teens (up to age 14). Does this mean that incidents involving older teens aren't considered COCSA, or are they just less commonly reported? I'm trying to understand how age affects how these experiences are categorized and recognized. ~ Our Wave Community
description: <p>Thank you for asking this. The age at which someone experiences unwanted or abusive sexual contact doesn't determine whether it was harmful or valid. While...
url: https://community.ourwave.org/en/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351.md
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# I've noticed in discussions about child-on-child sexual abuse (COCSA) that most cases seem to involve victims who are young children or early teens (up to age 14). Does this mean that incidents involving older teens aren't considered COCSA, or are they just less commonly reported? I'm trying to understand how age affects how these experiences are categorized and recognized.

\[Image: Dr. Laura\]

Answer by **Dr. Laura**

PhD Mental Health Nurse & Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner

Topics:[Understanding specific types of trauma and harm](/en/learn?tags=understanding-specific-types-of-trauma-and-harm)

Thank you for asking this. The age at which someone experiences unwanted or abusive sexual contact doesn't determine whether it was harmful or valid. While many reported cases of COCSA involve younger victims, this doesn't mean that experiences involving older teens are any less serious or impactful.

There are several reasons why reported cases might show this pattern. Younger children may be more vulnerable and less able to recognize or resist inappropriate behavior. Older teens might be less likely to report their experiences due to shame, confusion about what happened, or fear of not being believed. Additionally, incidents between older teens might sometimes be categorized differently in research or clinical settings, particularly as they approach the legal age of consent. This can create a complex grey area where experiences might be legally viewed one way but still be emotionally or psychologically harmful.

Societal understanding of childhood and adolescence also plays a role in how these experiences are categorized. Teenagers often occupy a complex space between childhood and adulthood, which can affect how their experiences are labeled and understood. When teens are in dating relationships, similar harmful experiences might be categorized as dating violence or sexual assault rather than COCSA, even though the dynamics and impact may be similar.

What's most important is not the age at which something happened or how it's labeled, but rather the impact it had and continues to have on you. If you experienced unwanted sexual contact as an older teen, those experiences and their effects are just as valid and deserving of support as those of younger survivors.

If you're trying to make sense of your own experiences, please know that there are trauma-informed professionals who understand these complexities and can help you process what happened, regardless of the age at which it occurred. Thank you for reaching out to us. You are not alone.

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Rica](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=cr)[\[Image: Cuba\]Cuba](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=cu)[\[Image: Dominican Republic\]Dominican Republic](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=do)[\[Image: Ecuador\]Ecuador](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=ec)[\[Image: El Salvador\]El Salvador](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=sv)[\[Image: Equatorial Guinea\]Equatorial Guinea](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=gq)[\[Image: Guatemala\]Guatemala](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=gt)[\[Image: Honduras\]Honduras](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=hn)[\[Image: Ireland\]Ireland](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=ie)[\[Image: Japan\]Japan](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=jp)[\[Image: Mexico\]Mexico](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=mx)[\[Image: Nicaragua\]Nicaragua](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=ni)[\[Image: New Zealand\]New Zealand](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=nz)[\[Image: Panama\]Panama](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=pa)[\[Image: Paraguay\]Paraguay](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=py)[\[Image: Peru\]Peru](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=pe)[\[Image: Puerto Rico\]Puerto Rico](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=pr)[\[Image: Spain\]Spain](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=es)[\[Image: United Kingdom\]United Kingdom](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=gb)[\[Image: Uruguay\]Uruguay](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=uy)[\[Image: Venezuela\]Venezuela](/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351?country=ve)

English

[English](/en/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351)[Español](/es/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351)[日本語](/ja/answer/ive-noticed-in-discussions-about-child-on-child-sexual-abuse-cocsa-that-most-cases-seem-to-involve-victims-who-are-young-children-or-early-teens-up-to-age-14-does-this-mean-that-incidents-involving-older-teens-arent-considered-cocsa-or-are-they-just-less-commonly-reported-im-trying-to-understand-how-age-affects-how-these-experiences-are-categorized-and-recognized-351)

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Grounding activity

Find a comfortable place to sit. Gently close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths - in through your nose (count to 3), out through your mouth (count of 3). Now open your eyes and look around you. Name the following out loud:

5 – things you can see (you can look within the room and out of the window)

4 – things you can feel (what is in front of you that you can touch?)

3 – things you can hear

2 – things you can smell

1 – thing you like about yourself.

Take a deep breath to end.

From where you are sitting, look around for things that have a texture or are nice or interesting to look at.

Hold an object in your hand and bring your full focus to it. Look at where shadows fall on parts of it or maybe where there are shapes that form within the object. Feel how heavy or light it is in your hand and what the surface texture feels like under your fingers (This can also be done with a pet if you have one).

Take a deep breath to end.

Ask yourself the following questions and answer them out loud:

1\. Where am I?

2\. What day of the week is today?

3\. What is today’s date?

4\. What is the current month?

5\. What is the current year?

6\. How old am I?

7\. What season is it?

Take a deep breath to end.

Put your right hand palm down on your left shoulder. Put your left hand palm down on your right shoulder. Choose a sentence that will strengthen you. For example: “I am powerful.” Say the sentence out loud first and pat your right hand on your left shoulder, then your left hand on your right shoulder.

Alternate the patting. Do ten pats altogether, five on each side, each time repeating your sentences aloud.

Take a deep breath to end.

Cross your arms in front of you and draw them towards your chest. With your right hand, hold your left upper arm. With your left hand, hold your right upper arm. Squeeze gently, and pull your arms inwards. Hold the squeeze for a little while, finding the right amount of squeeze for you in this moment. Hold the tension and release. Then squeeze for a little while again and release. Stay like that for a moment.

Take a deep breath to end.

Try another grounding activity

I feel grounded and ready